What are fake friends?
In human relationships, fake friends are illusions that appear genuine but hide their true intentions.
Fake friends are people who act like they are your friends, but they don’t care about you or want the best for you. They might not be honest and might only be seeking opportunities or pretending to be friends for their own gain. They may be friendly when it suits them but disappear when things get tough.
Friends form deep connections through trust, helping each other, and sharing experiences that last through tough times and remain strong over time.
11 True Signs of Fake Friends:
1-They belittle you:
Real friends are those who uplift you and support you. They refrain from disrespecting or belittling you. Instead, they offer helpful advice and suggestions with the genuine intention of seeing you succeed.
On the contrary, fake friends display indifference towards your emotions. The more you lend an ear to them, the more your sense of empowerment dwindles. These individuals need to recognize your aspirations, dreams, and unique abilities.
2-Not putting in enough effort:
They don’t truly value friendship, as they often cancel plans, don’t invest time and energy, and always put others’ needs before yours.
3-They hold grudges:
We all make mistakes, and it is important to acknowledge and learn from them. When it comes to the impact of our mistakes on relationships, it depends on the type of people these relationships are. A good friend will forgive you and move on because they love you despite the hurt caused by your mistake. On the other hand, a fake friend might not be able to forgive you or forget quickly and might hold grudges despite your apologies.
Related: Understanding Complicated Relationships: 15 Signs & 8 Causes
Related: 12 Signs Of An Unhealthy Relationship
4-They break your trust:
Fake friends may disregard your trust by sharing your secrets with others, even after explicitly asking them not to. They may engage in conversations behind your back, ultimately breaking the trust you have placed in them.
5-They take advantage of you:
At times, you might feel like your friends are only using you. For instance, they could ask you to join a study group just to copy your notes, invite you to a concert because they don’t want to go alone, pretend to be your friend to borrow your car, or take you shopping just so you can wait in line for them and more.
Fake friends tend to take advantage of others since they don’t fear losing their friendship. Consequently, there is no reason to be afraid of losing them either.
6-They are selfish:
Fake friends are people who are completely self-absorbed, mainly concerned with fulfilling their own needs and desires. They hardly ever take the time to think about their own needs, desires, and goals.
7-They only care about their needs:
Fake friends are only there for their benefit. They may not talk to you for days, but when they need something, like a ride, they will suddenly reach out. It’s important to remember that real friendship is mutual and doesn’t involve using each other. Your time is better spent enjoying yourself alone rather than wasting it on false friends.
8-They over-criticize you:
A true friend does not excessively criticize you. If someone constantly questions your behaviors, ideas, or choices, they may not be a genuine friend. They’re fake. While a certain amount of disagreement is normal in any relationship, an excessive amount is a red flag.
9-They do not provide support to you:
If a friend constantly cannot be there for you when you need them, it indicates their lack of investment in the relationship. Instead of offering emotional support and attentiveness, they might provide half-hearted affirmations or comments. A true friend will prioritize your needs and offer encouragement and emotional support.
10-They spread false information about you:
Friendship builds an incredible bond on a foundation of trust. So, if people you consider close friends deceive you or spread lies about you, it’s obvious they don’t embody true friendship. Honestly, you don’t need them in your life because they only hold you back from growing and being happy.
Related: 9 Types of Friendships You’ll Encounter in Life
11-They might envy you:
Fake friends might feel jealous when you do well, and they might even try to compete with you instead of being happy for you.
How to deal with fake friends?
1-Surround yourself with real friends:
Making sure that your circle of friends comprises genuine and good friends instead of fake ones is essential. To do this, it’s really important to spend time with friends who truly care about you and want what’s best for you. This will ensure a strong, supportive, and authentic group of friends surrounding you.
Related:10 Tips to Maintain Lasting and Strong Friendships
2-Put your emotional requirements first:
When dealing with fake friends, focus on how you feel inside. If a friendship makes you feel tired or unhappy, it’s important to think about yourself first. You can take a break or spend less time with them if it doesn’t make you feel good. It’s better to have a few true friends than many fake ones.
Related:How to Find Emotional Healing?
3-Lessen your interaction with them:
It’s not always necessary to completely cut off a fake friendship. If you have mutual friends or share a workplace, it might be impractical to end things completely. Instead, accept that you won’t see this person one-on-one very often. Avoid inviting them to any personal outings or small gatherings, and just keep them on the outskirts of your life.
4-Set limits:
If you have a fake friend, it’s not wise to spend a lot of time and energy on them. Pay attention to how much you can handle being around them and adjust your interactions accordingly.
In your friendships, be careful about who you give your attention to. Don’t give too much to people who don’t respect you or don’t follow your rules.
Remember, you don’t have to be respectful to someone who disrespects you. If dealing with a fake friend becomes difficult, it’s okay to keep your distance, but still be polite when you’re around them with others. Focus on building real friendships and look for people who have similar values to you.
Related: The Limits of Friendship
5-Talk with them:
One way to address the issue of fake friends is by starting a conversation with them. If you feel like your friend frequently behaves deceitfully or conceals things, don’t ignore these signs. Instead, take the time to talk to them about your concerns and provide clear reasons for your unease.
A real and good friend, upon hearing your observations, will reflect and make an effort to change their behavior. However, But if they ignore your worries and keep acting the same, you can be sure they’re not real friends and don’t want to change.
This realization allows you to determine your next course of action.
Related: How to Speak Well in 15 Easy Steps ?
In conclusion
By recognizing and distancing ourselves from fake friends, we can nurture authentic bonds that enrich our lives.
2 Comments
I have a scenario. I have a friend who wanted to introduce me to their friend to potentially match. In short, it wasn’t fruitful as the friend wasn’t very engaging. When I shared this with my friend and noted that I didn’t think it was a good fit, they noted that they talked with the friend. The firmed noted that they were very busy and that they may talk to me. To note, I did also note prior that I assumed that they were just very busy. My friend also went on to say that I was being too sensitive and that I should essentially wait for them to make time. My thing is that my time is just as important as theirs. I don’t think it’s fair for me to put my life on hold for a maybe situation and then be shamed under the guise of being too sensitive. Last time I checked I have a life too. I’m just found it a bit distasteful and disrespectful as if I’m beneath this friend and am expected to cater to them at my expense. My friend also went on to say that I should try harder.
All that noted, I’m starting to question their intentions toward me. I don’t think that’s how people should be treated. What’s your thoughts on this? Thanks.
Thank you for sharing your experience and thoughts. It sounds like you’re dealing with a challenging situation, and it’s important to recognize your feelings and boundaries in any relationship.
You’re right that your time and well-being are just as important as anyone else’s. It’s not fair to wait forever for someone who isn’t making an effort, and it’s normal to feel upset when your feelings are dismissed.
Mutual respect and effort are essential in any relationship. If you feel disrespected or undervalued, it’s important to speak up and set boundaries that protect your well-being. Trust your instincts and focus on relationships that bring you positivity and respect.
Regarding your friend, having an honest conversation about how their comments made you feel might help. A good friend will understand and respect your perspective.
Thank you again for sharing your story. It’s a reminder that we should all seek relationships built on mutual respect and understanding.
❤